Trust is a fundamental and integral part of any healthy relationship. Therefore, It is especially important to have a relationship of trust with our children, in order to ensure their proper psycho-emotional development and to have the comfort to share with us everything,what concerns them. Many times, in practice it is more difficult than we think to build a relationship of trust with our children. But it is certainly not impossible.
How to build a relationship of trust with the child
*We meet the needs of the baby
The child's trust in us is built from the time he is a baby. When the baby cries, we respond to his crying, trying to reassure him, learns to trust us.
*We pay attention to the communication between us
As the child gets older, we look for opportunities to talk to him about what interests him or concerns him. We ask his opinion on something, so that he knows that we appreciate it and we listen actively, showing him that it is important to us. We do not characterize his questions or concerns as "stupid" or "excessive", but on the contrary we listen to it with care and understanding.
*We are honest
It may be obvious, but really our sincerity towards the child, is crucial to building a relationship of trust with him. If the child sees us upset, we do not answer him that we are well. This does not mean that we have to share everything with him,what concerns us, just to admit that we are sad. If again the child asks us a question, the answer of which we do not know, we show him our uncertainty, explaining that we will look for the answer.
*We value honesty
We explain to the child that even if one of his actions does not find us agreeable or disappoints us, lies make the situation worse. Of course, for the child to admit his mistakes and be honest, must grow in a context with limits but not severe punishments that will terrorize it.
*We avoid promises that we cannot keep
Children have an innate tendency to believe their parents in everything,what do they call them. So if we have promised something to our little one, it is good to fulfill it. The more often we change our mind or break our promises, the more we shake the child's confidence.
*We look strong
A parent who looks constantly panicked, worried and phobic creates in the child the impression that he can not bear something "heavy". So, if there is something that concerns the child, he may prefer to hide it from his parents, so as not to disturb them. Our children must consider us strong, so that they feel safe and can trust us with their concerns.
*We stay cool
If every time the child confesses to us something that worries us, we react losing our composure, it is only a matter of time before he stops talking to us honestly, especially as he grows up. Even if an information worries us, we keep our cool and look for the most effective way to advise the child about it. For sure, many times this is more difficult than it sounds, but it is also necessary to have a relationship of trust with the child.