When children do something, we reward them, we deprive them of privileges or try the classic logical consequences. However, sometimes we may feel that despite all the efforts and strategies we follow, the child continues to behave badly, to contradict and ignore us. This may mean that we make some of the following mistakes in our discipline.
10 frequent mistakes we make in child discipline
Mistake 1 - We lose our temper
Intense anger can make us very scary for our children. At the same time, gives them a very bad example of managing emotions. When our little one does something that makes us very angry, we take a deep breath before reacting and do not speak until we feel calm again. The goal is to correct a wrong behavior, not to break out. Certainly there will be times when we will not be able to avoid raising the volume of our voice, which is completely understandable and human. Then we apologize, we explain to the child that the parents also make mistakes and we remind him that we love him very much.
Mistake 2 - We are not consistent
The negative consequences must be constant. If we have warned the child that if he continues the bad behavior he will be punished (e.g. if you hit your brother, you will not have access to the tablet for 3 days), and then we do not apply the punishment, we pass on the message that he can do anything,what does she want, without consequences.
Mistake 3 - We constantly say "no"
First of all, from one point onwards it ceases to be effective. Toddlers have a huge need to explore the world, therefore we will soon begin to be ignored. Besides, the many "no's" create a sense of oppression that no one enjoys. So we make sure to add an alternative to every ban. For example: "You can not fill your kitchens with water, because it is cold. But we can make "peas" with your plasticine ".
Mistake 4 - We do not take into account the age of the child
The age of the child influences the disciplinary approach we will follow. Younger children need immediate consequences, while older ones understand that their misbehavior in the morning can have consequences later in the day.
Mistake 5 - We do not respect the characteristics of our child
Our child's characteristics influence how he responds to various discipline strategies. Characteristics include personality, temperament, the talents, The skills, strengths and weaknesses. For example, Raising a child who is easily upset requires different discipline strategies compared to a calm child who is willing to compromise.. So we think about what kind of rules, Limits and consequences best fit the unique characteristics of our child.
Mistake 6 - We want to control everything
The children, especially in infancy, are excited to make decisions. Let us not deprive them all! We let our little ones feel that they have control over certain things that are not so important, such as the t-shirt they will wear or the color of their new bag.
Mistake 7 - We do not praise good behavior
A child who receives praise for his good behavior is more likely to continue in the future and obey the rules. If we find that the child does not receive enough positive reinforcement for his good behavior, we adjust our discipline strategy to increase his motivation to behave well.
Mistake 8 - We inadvertently encourage bad behavior
Sometimes children receive encouragement for negative behaviors, which makes them continue the bad behavior. For example, a child who receives a lot of attention because he whines, learns that whining is an effective way to get attention.
Mistake 9 - We proceed to characterizations
We take care not to tell him that he is a bad kid, that he does like a baby or that he is spoiled, as this makes us stubborn and reduces his self-esteem. Instead, we limit ourselves to commenting on unwanted behavior.
Mistake 10 - We do not choose our battles
No child can always behave perfectly, nor should this be the case. We single out the rules that are really important to us, we insist on them and ignore the mistakes that are not such a big problem.
Source: imommy.gr
